Plot holes, changed premises and continuity errors in the moron's farewell address

This blog is supposed to be about nitpicking fictional shows, not newscasts or special news presentations. But King George W's farewell address last night made me mad not only because it pre-empted one of my favorite shows (despite its brevity) but because it so clearly showed George W. Bush's ignorance of history, fairly recent history even. It's as if his speech was written by one of those lazy sitcom writers who join the staff late in the show's run but don't bother to watch earlier episodes. (And what about Darth Cheney? Absolutely creepy and evil.)

Take, for example, when Bush said "You may not agree with some tough decisions I have made, but I hope you can agree that I was willing to make the tough decisions." What tough decisions? (Plural). Name just one of those tough decisions. Bush never made any tough decisions. Do I pull the plug on my comatose father when the doctors give him a 30% chance of coming out of it? That's a tough decision. Do I accept a buyout from my job when I'm still two years shy of retirement? That's another tough decision, one which, thanks to Bush's economic policies, many middle-class Americans have had to make. The decisions Bush has made are very easy in comparison: Do I satisfy my desire to give out tax cuts? Do I gratify my desire to attack Iraq even though none of the hijackers were Iraqi? Do I give an excuse for not visiting wounded soldiers and Marines because I just don't like visiting hospitals? Do I appoint to the Supreme Court a friend with no experience as a judge? All Bush's decisions were matters of instant gratification, and each time Bush chose to gratify his desires.

Bush also reminded the people that "America has gone more than seven years without another terrorist attack on our soil." He doesn't know that America had gone two centuries without a terrorist attack, and that that attack took place on his watch. He's conveniently forgotten all the warnings he ignored. Osama bin Laden had wanted to knock down the World Trade Center since the 1990s. By the way, where is Osama bin Laden? So much for smoking him out. Bush said that "Every morning, I received a briefing on the threats to our nation. And I vowed to do everything in my power to keep us safe." Yes, you did, every single morning since the day you were sworn in back in January 2001, and also through that crucial date of August 6, 2001. "America did nothing to seek or deserve this conflict." Let's give him that one, for the moment. So... what exactly did Iraq do to "seek or deserve" the conflict which has killed at least twice more of their citizens than 9/11 did of ours? (I'm going off the numbers on icasualties.org). Having a bunch of empty canisters laying around is a good enough reason to bomb them.

"These are very tough times for hardworking families, but the toll would be far worse if we had not acted." And that toll would have been a lot less if you hadn't wasted your predecessor's budget surplus. Supposedly "we will show the world once again the resilience of America's free enterprise system." If it really is so resilient, why was it necessary to bail out the banks? (Remember that the money given to the automotive industry is a loan, not a bailout).

I could go on and on, but I'll just say one more thing: let's ask a rarely asked question, one which Bush himself forgot to ask last night: is our children learning? No, they isn't, not really. All the No Child Left Behind Act has accomplished is to create more headaches for teachers. Because they just didn't have enough with their huge paychecks and lack of additional duties (nurse, babysitter, etc.).